open letters

An open letter to ex boyfriend

Dear ex boyfriend,

It has been a few years since we broke up. I am writing to just get all of this off of my chest! I did not know how to tell you without telling you off how much you hurt me. You were the "love of my life", so I thought. And well, in all honesty you hurt me. You hurt me so much I shut myself off from any other man that would come my way. Not only did you just hurt me but, you broke up with me over the phone. After you gave my parents a letter to give to me which I finally received from them about 3 months after you wrote it, I finally responded to you. All I wanted was a simple apologie from all of the things you did and said to hurt me. I was not looking to get back together. I just wanted an apologie. That was it. But your pride was too deep to even give me that. I think never getting an apologie from you just tore me up inside. I thought you at least cared about me a little to at least say you were sorry. Tears drenched my pillow every night for about a year.I did not know a person could cry so much. I can't explain how much I loved you, but I did. I still to this day, don't under stand why I loved you and while Im typing this annonymous letter that you probably will never read, I still can't quite find the words to express to you how much I did. It hurt that you never really loved me back It hurt that you lied and told me that you did love me It hurt that you broke up with me over the phone rather than in front of me it hurt that you never cared that I hurt it hurts that you NEVER once apologiezed it hurts to know that you probably never think about me it hurts that you called me out of my name. I never cheated I never lied I never did anything "uncalled for" that you had claimed I did. I simply just loved you and I loved you for who you were. Or, I should say now who I thought you were I still miss you and I don't know how to love someone the way I once loved you it's hard moving on when your like me. someone like me only falls in love once, and maybe if im lucky twice. someone like me does not fall easily someone like me has true, unconditional love. God only knows why you did what you did to me and I guess I will never know the real truth. I will never have answers all I can do is finally move on and let you go I have to so I guess that's what Im doing. Goodbye my ex. I will always love you even if you no longer love me. I miss you more than you know. I wish that we never ended and that you loved me like the way I loved you. I honestly thought you were my "soul mate"and so far, I have yet to meet a man that I can fall in love with. while, we were not perfect as nothing in life ever is, I thought we fit perfectly together I guess I was wrong. I think I will always love you but you'll never know that and you'll never care. I wish I knew the real you when I first met you, because if I had known you lied about your feelings I never would have let myself fall in love with you I would have just remained your friend. it was a long on and off 4 years but now it's time for me to really honestly move on and it took me way too long to realize this I don't know why it took me this long but it did. I wish it would have happened sooner because than maybe life without you in mine would have been easier these last 3 years anyhow, I love you I always will I wished that we would have worked out. but I will move on finally without you. and finally let myself love another man! I just pray that maybe one day you will see the way you treated me was wrong and that you never do it to anyone else.

Sincerely,
your ex girlfriend


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